Monday, June 1, 2009

June Restlessness...


I realized the other day that I am a little bored with my own themes and issues! How's that for a strange bump on the road to personal enlightenment? We all have our themes--those things that we just seem to keep facing down and working on. It took me a few decades before I was even aware of what my themes and issues were. Now that I know them, I still can't seem to quite work my way out and around them!

I told a couple friends that I sometimes feel like I am perpetually trapped in 1986--same sorts of people doing the same sorts of things; I'm playing the same roles over and over again with the same "types" of people and the same types of situations. I get bored with my own self! I've been looking around my world--which is a fine little world really--and wondering if there isn't something more out there somewhere? I'm itching for a move, a new scene, a different voice on the end of the phone, a different pleasant twist--I think I'm ready for some new themes and issues!

I suppose the obvious answer to the restlessness is that I still haven't learned my lessons. If I had--if I had figured out how to be a different sort of person attracting different sorts of people and activities into my life I would be in a different place. As simple as that sounds, it seems to be trickier than that. Instead, I am choosing to chalk it up to June restlessness--here we are in the sweet morning of summer and I know that I have three lovely months to enjoy the season. Will I make the most of it or get bogged down in work and challenges? Who will I know and what will I be doing when September rolls around? Who knows? Maybe I will end up having moved or changed in some major way? Of course, the thing about restlessness is that it is just too early to tell...

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